Sirbrightside unluckily in his rush to latch onto something for safety fails to gain a strong grip on the vent and falls on top of me. Angry at being disturbed I materialise a horde of dogs which scream/sequel like pigs as their war cry and send them after him and the clones! Annoyingly sam_g appears next to me and notices me and therefore uses my weakens for ice cream to trick me into running in the opposite direction with a well aimed throw a some chocolate fudge ice cream.

Ninja'd like a pig.

sam g:
Sucker! My nose is on the front of my face!

That made me lol.

I began making ninja stars by sticking knife blades to CD's (you know, those small ones, wii size); pretty soon I'll have ample supply of those. Then there is the matter of the rest of my ninja suit... All I can find in this damn dept. store is clothes...bras...bras...food...bras...food...clothes...bras...bras...clothes...appliances....bras.....bras.....bras.....bras....nothing suitable for a ninja (maybe the bras...). At the end of the day, I decided to stockpile lots of plain black clothes and sewing equipment, and, sitting down to a copy of "Sewing and you!!HEEEHEEEHEEE" I began to work...

I manage to escape from the dogs, thanks to sam g's ice cream trick, and climb into the airtight closet. Jeepers Creepers is playing, and I turn to see Malevolent Stranger in there, along with me, sky, Pm0n3y and sam g.

*Cue pokemon battle music*

Finally after recovering from my minor epileptic attack due to the flashing lights of the Pokemon battle intro music and images on the large screen tv's in the mall going off, I found my now destroyed ice cream. To get revenge I gave Sven und EIN HUND a Fully mechanised Space Marine Suit and then used an illusion of a rabbit to get him to attack Sam_g. I then began to seek out Sirbrightside who seemed to have disappeared for only he knew where the last ice cream store was in the mall!!!

I finally re-spawn after being blown to pieces, and at last build my Remote Alligator Mk.1

This is equipped with a nail gun and camera on it's back, and can travel around 30mph. I drive it around the corner and open fire at those that I see there (the camera isn't very clear, and I cant make out who it is). I prepare it to bite anything that approaches it with it's clamp-like jaws.

A strange, crocadillian form comes into view, and just as I am about to have an awesome fight, it shoots me and someone else. I'll pick... Pm0n3y.

We are both respawned in Game, next to a Wii, Super Smash Bros. Brawl, and two controllers.

*Cue pokemon battle music*

I jump up and down inside the vent until it collapses, depositing me and Sky in a stationary store. I grab a staple gun, staple her to a wall and run off to find somebody else to staple.

I turn at the sound of sam g rounding the corner behind me. I spin my crocodile round to face him and fire away with the nailgun, but forget that I am in between them. I receive 12 nails in my back and fall forwards, with the rest of the nails headed towards sam g.

I shoot staples at the nails and they cancel each other out. I then shoot two more staples into the mechanical amphibian's eyes to blind it, then run away very fast.

I awake from my snooze and look for someone to eviscerate

I get up and pull the nails out of my back. I walk over to the alligator and see that sam hit in the eyes rather then aiming for the camera for some reason.

I perform a few modifications, giving it it's own intelligence system. It then immediately attacks me. I run away, and the alligator looks around and attacks someone else, although I no longer have control over it and don't know who it is.

Noticing Jed is awake, I come up with a cunning plan. I grab him from behind, then perform a secret thief art: "Wall staples". I staple a ladder of staples against the wall, then climb up them, still holding on to Jed. When I reach the ceiling, I jump off, using Jed as a landing platform.

As I fall to the ground and bleed to death from the wounds I received from the alligator (they were fatal apparently), something occurs to me. I respawn, and head towards the Farming Equipment section.

After wandering around, I head towards the historic farming equipment section instead, trying to avoid meeting anyone before I get there.

I wake up in a pool of my own blood, with a robot alligator biting my arm. That kinda hurts. Luckily, there is a poorly armored part around its midsection that I kick, managing to immobilize the alligator.

Having run out of ideas for improvised weapons, I decide to go to the library and read some books.

I manage to impale Sam on my spiky ribs, then wander over to the food

I find a book that looks interesting, the cover is yellow and black and there's a smiley on it. After flipping through the pages, I finally get a idea.

I burn down the library with my trusty lighter and head to the department store.

I go to the toy store and get two super soakers then I go to the cigar shop and buy two zippos. I then duck tape the zippos to the front of the super soakers. Fianly I go to the gas station and fill up the super soakers. Bingo two Flamethrowers.

Once inside the department store, a cashier starts throwing oranges at me. I duck behind a counter, sneak up behind him and set him on fire. Apparently orange juice is highly inflammable.

After a while, I come out of the store, holding my trusty lighter and a can of hair spray, ready for the fight.

I exit the theatre to find this place in complete disarray.

Watching as several other people are running around in makeshift, but very creative, guns and vehicles, I ran to the hardware store, where I grab a construction hat and crowbar.

I then run into the liquor store and hit the store clerk with the bar, (since I'm underage, he wouldn't let me.) rip his shirt into pieces, and grab a lighter and a few bottles of...I dunno, beer.

I then run out to the gas station (Or wherever there's gas, I have no idea), emptying the bottles as I go, and fill them with gas. I head to the toy store and grab a toy cannon, stuff the bottles with the rags from the clerk and load them into the cannon, and fire at the first unlucky soul I see.

This...is not very creative...sorry.

I get hit in the back of the head by XIII and bang my face on the table.
So I shove him into the fountain and attempt to drown him

I scream and try to claw at him to let me go, and panic even more as a drowning timer appears over my head.

I wave my hands around until they set upon my cannon, then aim it behind me and fire it at Jedimethis. The explosion incinerates both of us, and I respawn in an elevator.

I get up, brush off my rib-hole wounds and pick up my trusty old staple gun and golf club. I look down at the ground and spy a cake, but decide to just leave it there. Something told me that this cake had been through much hardship, but that that was someone else's story... (crossover threads FTW)
Anyway, I run over to the fountain where Jed is drowning XIV, knock Jed out with my golf club, then staple Jed's ears to the bottom of the fountain.
...or at least, that's what I would have done, if XIV hadn't just unwittingly exploded both himself and Jed.

A crocodile comes out of nowhere to kill Pm0n3y, and I get annoyed - he was on one life, and like 300%! I'LL KILL YOU!

I hit the crocodile repeatedly with my controller, and it has no effect. I scream out of fear, and look around for something else to use - aha! An ET games cartridge!

I shove the ET games cartridge into the crocodile, making it faint from the sheer terribleness of the game. Then I pick up the crocodile, and a disc of Duke Nukem Forever, and run to the Electronics Department.

I managed to spawn right where I started, in the food section.

So I once again start eating and stockpiling cutlery

I see a commotion up ahead of me finally, thinking it sirbrightside, I use my God powers to don my Assassins creed Altair disquise, and then run up towards him ready to stab him, however it is only after I kill the figure and rest its head against the floor that I realise its XIII, too late to regret my actions I turn around and trip, falling into the now very cleverly/easily missable elevator shaft.

Ironically the shaft brings me into the chocolate aisle in a giant supermarket

I end up in the electronics department, and get a million and one tools, getting to work on the crocodile, so it won't attack me. I then remove the ET cartridge and replacce it with the Duke Nukem Forever CD, giving it +100000 awesome! Annoyingly, it starts to stall, and I realise that the only thing to do now is feed it to bring it back.

I grab two power drills, and drill to the lower floor, and find the food section, and some meat. I feed it some nachos, and it powers up, heading straight for Jedamethis.

I backstab claymorez for double posting. The mall is now flooded.

I swim through the mall, looking for the sofa department. I swim up to the (mercifully non-flooded) second floor, and build a little fort out of sofa cushions.

I notice SirBryghtside (I'm going to call you Sir from now on), and start running, making sure to leave the the slippy margarine all over the floor as I go, towards the plumbing and metalworks

after recovering from being an assassin who was assassinated, I decide to summon a host of Mermen, like Posiden, and set them out to find and kill everyone, (there are 5 of them sent in each direction) and then set about on my quest for a chocolate fudge icecream once again.

I happily watch as the mermen after me suffocate(?) due to lack of water

sam g:
I swim through the mall, looking for the sofa department. I swim up to the (mercifully non-flooded) second floor, and build a little fort out of sofa cushions.

Jedamethis:
I notice SirBryghtside (I'm going to call you Sir from now on), and start running, making sure to leave the the slippy margarine all over the floor as I go, towards the plumbing and metalworks

claymorez:
after recovering from being an assassin who was assassinated, I decide to summon a host of Mermen, like Posiden, and set them out to find and kill everyone, (there are 5 of them sent in each direction) and then set about on my quest for a chocolate fudge icecream once again.

Jedamethis:
I happily watch as the mermen after me suffocate(?) due to lack of water

[read comments before laughing at my very much alive mermen]

The crocodile runs after Jed, but slips on the butter. luckily the wings I installed get it past that obstacle, and it shoots Jed in the face with its nailgun multiple times.

Meanwhile, I have no wings, so continuously slip on the butter, so decide to give up trying and have a chocolate fudge ice cream from the counter. THE LAST CHOCOLATE FUDGE ICE CREAM.