"Wow, i really haven't been here for a while." I say waking up from a almost endless slumber.
I spot Ren stabbing a dead Mudkip. i run up to him and punt the lifeless Pokemon corpse. It sails past two yellow bars.

"And it's good!" I say, throwing up my hands.

"Where have you been all this time?" Ren asks me.

"I WAS FROZEN TODAY! well... not really today, but like a few weeks ago, or sumpthin." I say before Ren punches me for saying another meme.

I run around, and catch up with Pm0n3y and Ren.

"I know we've had our differences, but, well, the evil emperor claymorez is plainly cheating. You guys want to help me kill him? We'll need to go get our weapons individually, ut we meet up later at the golf 'n' staplers store to get ready for the huge fight with the emperor. Oh yeah, and before you try doing anything rash, remember that I'm the ghost of Darth Vader, so you can't feasibly kill me."

I run off to the music shop to grab my epic musical spears, and fashion weapons from musical instruments.

"I'm gonna help too!" I decide, skidding over to the golf 'n' staplers store on my old skateboard from a couple of pages back.

"Well, hell i might as well. Not like i got nothing better to do." I say revving up the Lancer i still had somehow.

I return from the music section with three of my musical spears and a tuba that shoots flaming guitars from the end whenever you play an 'e'.

While running to the golf 'n' staplers store, I notice something.

I look around to check if anyone's there, and take it, stashing it away in my saddlebag, along with the musical spears and tuba.

I get to the golf 'n' staplers store, and wait with Pm0n3y and sam g for Ren to come with his weaponry.

Then we're going ALL OUT.

Whilst Sirbrightside is waiting, his head bowed upon one kneee, I appear before him, placing my palm upon his head and say "Well done my disciple, you have stayed in the shadows and have earned their trust, once they are all gathered, do the deed as you planned from the start and slaughter them and I shall give you your sisters soul". I then disappear in a wisp of smoke and whisper "Remember, I am watching".

SirBryghtside:
I will gain all your trust, and then kill you all. Starting with you Ren

Once Sam_g entered the golf store, and approached Sirbrightside, guard lowered, sirbrightside walked up to him and then when they embraced as brothers and allies he wispers in sam_g's ear, "I am sorry". Shock appears over sam_g's face but it is too late, the lightsaber impaled him through the head.

Pm0n3y then entered the store, and seeing the dead sam_g at Sirbrightsides feet launched himself calling, "traitorous - you were meant to defeat the emperor sirbrightside, not join him, you were the chosen one."

cue Battle music http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zqJYXoC1OQc

I beat the crap out of claymorez, taking full advantage of my stealth.

*dashes up to claymorez and hits with bat*

BOINK!

*picks up a teddy bear and rubber bands then shoots the teddy bear at Suiseiseki*

ummm.....fear me yet?

*throws arms out to side*

ZA WARUDO!

*negative filter, time freezes*

HYYYAH!!!

*swings and hits bear with baseball bat*

Soshite toki ga ugoki desu.

*time resumes, bear flies back at eatmorebabiesmmg00d*

the plush!! It burns! *shoots back with a tin can cross bow*

*braces*

Batter up!

*hits tin can back at eatmorebabiesmmg00d*

*head bleeds* owwwy....*makes a mcguyver-esque bomb out of duct tape nitroclycirin and a remote car then drives it at Suiseiseki*

*Runs up flight of stairs*

You car can't reach me up here sucker!

Little does Suiseiseki realise, I can reach her from up there!
*stab*
"Ouch!"

claymorez:

Pm0n3y then entered the store, and seeing the dead sam_g at Sirbrightsides feet launched himself calling, "traitorous - you were meant to defeat the emperor sirbrightside, not join him, you were the chosen one!"

cue Battle music http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zqJYXoC1OQc

"We trusted you! And you Betrayed us! How could you?!" i yell, in between hits from my Lancer.

Using amazing speed, i kick him out of the store. I rush at him. He swings at me, but i phase out before his hit could connect. I appear behind him. As he turns around, i kick him into the air, and jump up after him. We stay suspended in the air, as if time seemed to slow down. The other combatants that are nearby stop and watch the spectacle.

"Is that the Dancing Leaf Shadow?" Suiseiseki asks, astonished.

"I believe it is. You know what that means!" Pararaptor replied.

Long strings float gracefully out of my sleeves, and they wrap themselves around SirBS. Then we both come back down to earth upside down.

"Primary Lotus!!"

The impact forms a small crater in the ground. I step out of it, unscathed.

"Wait, Phil! By opening the fifth gate, you could destroy yourself!" I cry, respawning on a balcony above where Pm0n3y and Bryghtside are fighting.
"I have no other choice..." Pm0n3y replies. "Super-exploder death cannon lotus assault!" He starts glowing gold, and then explodes in a massive cloud of dust, taking Bryghtside with him.
"Claymorez... You'll pay for this..." I mutter. "CLAYMOREZZZZZZZZZZ!!!"

With the epic battle playing out in front of me, I load Thriller into the mall's PA system. Everybody stops what they are doing to do the Thriller dance with me, including the zombies. Then, at the peak of the song a HORRIFIC EXPLOSION takes place, sending dismembered limbs, shredded organs & brains flying across the mall.

Claymorez is sitting on his high-and-mighty throne, a few hundred metres away from where I am. "CLAYMOREZZZZZZ!!!!" I yell, sprinting at him with my golf clubs in my hands. "DIE!" I leap into the air, and at that exact moment, a load of dancing zombies explode, the force of the explosion propelling me towards my target.

...Oh, yes, and this song is playing.

SirBryghtside:
While running to the golf 'n' staplers store, I notice something.

I look around to check if anyone's there, and take it, stashing it away in my saddlebag...

claymorez:
Whilst Sirbrightside is waiting, his head bowed upon one knee, I appear before him, placing my palm upon his head and say "Well done my disciple, you have stayed in the shadows and have earned their trust, once they are all gathered, do the deed as you planned from the start and slaughter them and I shall give you your sisters soul". I then disappear in a wisp of smoke and whisper "Remember, I am watching".

/flashback.

sam g:
"Wait, Phil! By opening the fifth gate, you could destroy yourself!" I cry, respawning on a balcony above where Pm0n3y and Bryghtside are fighting.
"I have no other choice..." Pm0n3y replies. "Super-exploder death cannon lotus assault!" He starts glowing gold, and then explodes in a massive cloud of dust, taking Bryghtside with him.
"Claymorez... You'll pay for this..." I mutter. "CLAYMOREZZZZZZZZZZ!!!"

I grab the portal gun that I had kept for such an occasion out of my saddlebag. I shoot a blue portal in the ground just before impact, and we come out just where I put the orange portal.

On claymorez's face.

I then grab the 'over 9000' upgrade, use it, and therefore turn even more invincible. Just before the explosion, I kick Pm0n3y back through the orange portal, so that he will emerge unscathed.

I, using my 'over 9000' upgrade, claw off claymorez's lolcat tattoo, rendering him completely helpless. I stick it on myself, so I have triple invincibility, just before the huge explosion starts.

BOOM.

Out of the rubble of the mall, I appear, not a ghost, with no 'over 9000' upgrade, and with no lolcat tattoo. The mall is in pieces, and parts of claymorez are strewn all over the place, his god powers diminished.

Out of the rubble also comes a soul, that of my sister, the greatest builder in all the lands.

I insert it into Suiseiseki IRL's body, and nod towards the mall's remains, and she nods back, remaking the whole place in 10 seconds flat, all the people exactly as they were, and every shop but one.

That one is the God Store. We're not letting claymorez get his powers back this time.

I then remove my sister's soul from Suiseiseki IRL's body, and hide it in a bottle labelled 'non-alchoholic beer', the safest place in the mall.

I then seek out claymorez to exact my revenge, and find him in the golf 'n' staplers store, shaking.

I then repeatedly hit him with a golf club, and he respawns multiple times in the same place, and I laugh at him and his lack of God Powers.

I walk up to SirBS, feeling guilty for what i done.

"So, you weren't evil after all. Sorry for... y'know... Using the Primary Lotus on you".

"It's cool" He replies
"I would've done the same thing... if i knew how to".

After the heartfelt apologies, we turn our attentions back to the cowering, whimpering, Claymorez. I rev up my Lancer.

"I'm gonna enjoy this." I say, with an evil grin.

"Hey, Claymorez! You know what rhymes with justice?" I ask. "Staples!"
I grab a second staple gun off a shelf and, with awesome dual-wielding powers, coat every inch of Claymorez's skin with the metallic needles.

It turns out even mutilating people with golf clubs gets boring after a while...

I walk out of the room, and grab my musical spears instead and continue my mutilation of claymorez.

Finally the figure's leave the room. Leaving their dark work done.
Drip...........Drip..........Drip......drip.... The soft sound of pattering blood droplets slapping the face of the marble floor, falling like raindrops. The figure below is coated in blood. The copper tasting sludge oozing out of his wounds. Every small movement feels like the cutting of a thousand tiny blades. The figure's eyes, his eyes, those eyes are now a snowy white a mocking replacement of his once earthy brown eyes, a sure sign of his unquestionable blindness. The result of his captors handiwork. On closer inspection of the figure, one might say they saw something a kin to a man, however the many wounds, martyrs of his life, figure heads silently screaming of unquestionable torture remove him from such a distinction. No this thing couldn't be called a man. What remained was simply an animated corpse, a pack of meat.
More time passes. Nothing happens, no one enters the room, the only action is the minute expulsions of breathe from the figures lungs. His is wearing little now, but what remains of the rags his tortuorers left him with. His upper torso is bare of clothing, bare of skin for even that was taken from him. More time passes, and still no one returns and the figures head still remains resting upon the floor, alone but for the sound of blood caressing the floor and the courting smell of decay as his broken legs begin to decay. However something has changed. It's hard to notice, but undeniably it is there, there in those ghostly white eyes of his. Although they are blind to the world, those eyes see many things, they call out in silence a chant, an oath. Perhaps it is this, this silent call that is the most terrifying aspect of this nightmarish and horrific scene. For although the figure is blind, although he has clearly lost a great much, this call, this chant indeed never seems to end. Behind those eyes is something, something new. More time has passed and something, something that cannot be taken back, and something that will change everything has occured. For now, the room is empty, save for what to a passer by from a distance appears to be nothing more than the spilt art craft materials of an artist. For all that remains on the floor now is a puddle of Blood red, and shredded clothing, there is no body, there is no sign of what is to come.

- Thank you guys for the laughs etc - tad bit brutal ganging up on me in the end which was fair enough considering i did take advantage of my powers a bit n e eway I am taking a break from this for a while and when I come back my character will be a blind individual with no powers, and ill just be doing it for laughs - cya

claymorez:
Finally the figure's leave the room. Leaving their dark work done.
Drip...........Drip..........Drip......drip.... The soft sound of pattering blood droplets slapping the face of the marble floor, falling like raindrops. The figure below is coated in blood. The copper tasting sludge oozing out of his wounds. Every small movement feels like the cutting of a thousand tiny blades. The figure's eyes, his eyes, those eyes are now a snowy white a mocking replacement of his once earthy brown eyes, a sure sign of his unquestionable blindness. The result of his captors handiwork. On closer inspection of the figure, one might say they saw something a kin to a man, however the many wounds, martyrs of his life, figure heads silently screaming of unquestionable torture remove him from such a distinction. No this thing couldn't be called a man. What remained was simply an animated corpse, a pack of meat.
More time passes. Nothing happens, no one enters the room, the only action is the minute expulsions of breathe from the figures lungs. His is wearing little now, but what remains of the rags his tortuorers left him with. His upper torso is bare of clothing, bare of skin for even that was taken from him. More time passes, and still no one returns and the figures head still remains resting upon the floor, alone but for the sound of blood caressing the floor and the courting smell of decay as his broken legs begin to decay. However something has changed. It's hard to notice, but undeniably it is there, there in those ghostly white eyes of his. Although they are blind to the world, those eyes see many things, they call out in silence a chant, an oath. Perhaps it is this, this silent call that is the most terrifying aspect of this nightmarish and horrific scene. For although the figure is blind, although he has clearly lost a great much, this call, this chant indeed never seems to end. Behind those eyes is something, something new. More time has passed and something, something that cannot be taken back, and something that will change everything has occured. For now, the room is empty, save for what to a passer by from a distance appears to be nothing more than the spilt art craft materials of an artist. For all that remains on the floor now is a puddle of Blood red, and shredded clothing, there is no body, there is no sign of what is to come.

Wow, did you write that?

Anyway, back on topic...
"So, I guess the alliance is over now, eh?" I ask Pm0n3y. Without waiting for an answer, I smack him in the face with a golf club, then turn to Bryghtside, staple his feet to the ground and punch his teeth out.

While sam g runs away laughing, I decide to work out a way of breaking free from my staples.

I pick up my teeth from the floor, use them to remove the staples, and then stb them in Pm0n3y's back.

This amuses me, and I run off towards the gardening store.

"Gah! you bitch!" I yell at Sam while rubbing my face and pulling out a incisor.

Then SirBS stabs me with his teeth. I aim my Lancer at him and shoot up his arms. While he was screaming in pain, i pistol whip him with the gun, knocking him out. I then make my way to the Gamestop i inhabited so many posts ago.

"I guess you can't teach a dog new tricks." I say walking off.

Argh... My head...

I watch Pm0n3y running off, and instead go to the Forge World store.

I get a huge Eldar Jetbike, then zoom off to the gardening store, grab a rake, and fly directly towards Pm0n3y, wielding my rake like a lance or whatever jousters held.

I fit a sniper scope to my staple gun, buy a skyscraper from the Skyscraper Store, camp out on top of it and snipe Ren.
Then I hop down, land on the giant jelly i bought a while back, and do This to Bryghtside (I'm the guy with the hat; he's the zombie).

I dive out of the way of SirBS's attempt to impale me, dodging something that couldn't really do much damage. I scratch my head in confusion.

"Why didn't he get a shovel or something? At least then i would a little frightened" i say to myself

He turns around. I rev my Lancer.

"This won't take long" I say, running towards him.

I dodge sam g's pathetic attempt to kill me, and turn and see Pm0n3y running towards me.

I then press a button on the Rake's handle to make it breathe fire, and burn off Pm0n3y's stupid cotton candy hair.

sam g:

claymorez:
Finally the figure's leave the room. Leaving their dark work done.
Drip...........Drip..........Drip......drip.... The soft sound of pattering blood droplets slapping the face of the marble floor, falling like raindrops. The figure below is coated in blood. The copper tasting sludge oozing out of his wounds. Every small movement feels like the cutting of a thousand tiny blades. The figure's eyes, his eyes, those eyes are now a snowy white a mocking replacement of his once earthy brown eyes, a sure sign of his unquestionable blindness. The result of his captors handiwork. On closer inspection of the figure, one might say they saw something a kin to a man, however the many wounds, martyrs of his life, figure heads silently screaming of unquestionable torture remove him from such a distinction. No this thing couldn't be called a man. What remained was simply an animated corpse, a pack of meat.
More time passes. Nothing happens, no one enters the room, the only action is the minute expulsions of breathe from the figures lungs. His is wearing little now, but what remains of the rags his tortuorers left him with. His upper torso is bare of clothing, bare of skin for even that was taken from him. More time passes, and still no one returns and the figures head still remains resting upon the floor, alone but for the sound of blood caressing the floor and the courting smell of decay as his broken legs begin to decay. However something has changed. It's hard to notice, but undeniably it is there, there in those ghostly white eyes of his. Although they are blind to the world, those eyes see many things, they call out in silence a chant, an oath. Perhaps it is this, this silent call that is the most terrifying aspect of this nightmarish and horrific scene. For although the figure is blind, although he has clearly lost a great much, this call, this chant indeed never seems to end. Behind those eyes is something, something new. More time has passed and something, something that cannot be taken back, and something that will change everything has occured. For now, the room is empty, save for what to a passer by from a distance appears to be nothing more than the spilt art craft materials of an artist. For all that remains on the floor now is a puddle of Blood red, and shredded clothing, there is no body, there is no sign of what is to come.

Wow, did you write that?

Anyway, back on topic...
"So, I guess the alliance is over now, eh?" I ask Pm0n3y. Without waiting for an answer, I smack him in the face with a golf club, then turn to Bryghtside, staple his feet to the ground and punch his teeth out.

thx ya I wrote it, u see i am a fan fiction writer of warhammer 40k in my spare time.

i hide in a bed store with a nerf gun loaded with hot wax

SirBryghtside:

I then press a button on the Rake's handle to make it breathe fire, and burn off Pm0n3y's stupid cotton candy hair.

Unfortunately for me, i only have but a simple buzz cut, so the fire scorches every black fiber on my face. A breeze passes me by. it's cool wind blows past my upper lip. i reach for the lip. it's budding hairs have been singed off. This revelation infuriates me. Shit just got personal.

SirBS turns around, coming back for a third round.

He rushes at me with the jetbike, his modded rake bellowing hot flares. But this time, i'm ready for him. As he nears me with his weapon, i spin, sidestepping his charge and barely missing his rake. Then, in one swift motion, i snatch the rake away from him. Before he could even react, i launch the rake towards the jetbike's fuel tanks. The reaction between the fire and the gas causes an explosion.

"Well, that takes care of that" i say, picking up my Lancer. I continue my trek towards Gamestop.

When Pm0n3y arrives at Gamestop, he has a bad feeling. Something is out of place. He walks in, looks around and sits on a chair.

"Where are you?" he says.
"Here" I whisper, suddenly coming out of my hiding place.

Pm0n3y tries to get up, but realizes there was glue on his seat. I kick him, knocking his chair down, take his Lancer, and cut his face in half.